Wednesday, 29 September 2010

when tomorrow never comes

when we are happy celebrating a new born baby, trust me, at the same time there must be someone at some part of the world is also crying for losing someone, forever.

that is life. no one lives forever.

last 2 days, a birthday reminder from my facebook noted that it's a particular person's birthday. normally i would just wish anyone on my friend's list no matter how close i am with him or her because i know even a random and simple wish can make the person's day.

yes, if i could, i would. except, i couldn't. even if i wrote on the wall, the person just wouldn't get to reply it.

why? because she is no longer in this world. it has been almost a year since this young girl has left us. i feel like i am still in a state of shock because lately there are too many bad news about the lost of people who are dear to some people. and of course, to me.

on the 2nd day of raya, i lost my uncle who was very close to my family. to my parents, he was more of a friend than a mere 'biras' or 'ipar'. i remember during my secondary school, i used to stay at his house during weekends as my family was in kelantan at that time, and he and his family took a really good care of me. he was a successful person and i know he is loved by many people as he is really really generous and kind-hearted.

a few days before ramadhan, a very good friend of my brother was involved in a car accident and he couldn't be saved. it was a shocking piece of news because just a few days before he left us, was his birthday. and also, on the 7th day of syawal, a friend of mine whom i knew during AAJ days died because of an infection of the heart. yes, it broke my heart to hear all these news. not even a hari raya wish or a sorry i could tell them for any of my actions.

these news really make me think. if i were to go tomorrow, am i ready? what kind of things will i be remembered of? will people pray for me? and most of all, my ibadah. is it enough??

i am struggling with myself thinking these scary questions. i really hope only good things will be remembered when i leave. and also, like these late friends of mine, i sure hope people will pray and sedekah al-fatihah for me. anyway, i am taking this opportunity to ask for forgiveness to everyone for my wrongdoings. if i have hurt you in any way, i am truly sorry.

haih~ must be the wind from outside blowing so hard that i suddenly feel so melancholic. =P

and then.... again, there's another birthday reminder i couldn't wish.
al-fatihah to you my dear friend.

Sunday, 26 September 2010

bye bye summer, helloOo autumn!

hey, you can now put away your summer umbrellas, fancy fans, shorts, sleeveless and everything that you wear during the summer. now it's time for you to show off your new high heel boots, fury coats, a pair of new gloves and trendy muffler as it's no more summer bebeh!

ooh yes, you heard me!

for the last couple of days, it has been pretty cold. the temperature shot down in just 24 hours. for one day everyone was still fanning their faces with the free fans they got, and the next day people were literally freezing, for wearing the wrong outfit being unprepared for the cold day. and that, includes me. who knows the season can change in a day?

so, ' it's time to go gray this autumn-winter!,'said the magazine i read from somewhere. huh, like i care about the fashion and all. i always wonder why people turn all gray, black and colourless during the cold season? even the stalls are not selling flowery and colourful clothes anymore. that's sad. i love wearing and watching people with cheerful tone outfit. hurm, who ever make this silly rules anyway? luckily i don't really care about the latest trend, the things you should or should not wear yadaa yadaa... soOo....yippee! it means i'm free to wear anything!! yeah,unless it is thick and good enough to cover myself from cold. ^^

anyway, whatever you all might be wearing, i hope you all are prepared for the changing season and take care not to catch a cold!

**oh, the season really is changing as i can see that the stores are now having autumn sale and they are already selling pumpkins! yeah, for halloween. yeah, here, in japan. =P

Thursday, 23 September 2010

when you feel down

what do you do when you feel down?

A: pick up your phone and call your parents/friends
B: sleep
C: cry
D: eat
E: take a shower
F: go out and shop
G: you don't do anything, because you like it that way. >.<
H: all the above
I: none of the above (other answer:..................... )

i used to make a phone call (or phone calls) and talk non-stop with those who can listen to me talking when i feel low. well, obviously talking make me feel better. wayyy better than to be alone.

i was rather low when my parents left me for malaysia the other day. but instead of making a call to a friend or siblings, i went out shopping. shopping really is a cure to me. the moment i stepped off the bus, i went inside sogo, OIOI, daimaru and the list goes on.... i ended up getting home only around 8pm with almost 6 plastic bags in my hands. shop till you drop eh? yeah, you could say that. by the time i got home i was lethargic and forgot my sadness already.=)

oh well, sadness doesn't bring any good to me, you know. so to everybody out there, don't make me sad, or my purse will get thinner. =P

p/s: thanks to my ever good buddy pekah for calling me that day to make sure i was okay. hehe... so i didn't make a phone call, but i received some... thanks my great sis for your call and of course miss pekah.

p/p/s: i miss my parentsssssssssss T____________T

anyone, visit me will ya? air asia is making a promotion starting december.... rm99?? cheap huh? so what are you waiting for? you have a flight to book!! =D

Tuesday, 7 September 2010


i miss you.

yeah, 3 simple words yet they are truly meaningful. sometimes people might just say that out of habit, but it doesn't really matter because it never fails to make me warm inside. those words undeniably make people feel appreciated and remembered. such a good feeling eh? =)

well, in my case, i mean my words when i tell someone i miss him or her. looking at pictures, listening to music and even smelling something can make you remember someone. in a few days more we will celebrate aidilfitri and everyone seems really excited to get home to see family members. many and many posts on hari raya here and there. online raya card also seems the latest thing nowadays, that i assume the postmen in malaysia no longer have to work extra time. hehe, good for them!

due to many wishes and status updates especially on facebook, i really feel kinda left out. only having the lab technician by my side (i wonder what he is doing going in and out of the lab), i suddenly have this 'rindu' feeling to be in malaysia. even majority of the malaysians in kobe have gone back to malaysia. and out of all days, my labmates just have to go to a conference TODAY. GOSH!! how could you all leave me behind??? huh, only now i start to miss all of u! >.<

oh well oh well, i'm tough u know? the reason i'm still hanging around in kobe and not following the rest to kyushu for the conference is parents are finally arriving tomorrow!!! yipyipeee~!!!!! ignore everything else, put all the work aside, take the broom and start cleaning up!! yeah! that's my task for tonight =P

oh, wait a minute. did i say i miss malaysia?? oh, yeah. i do. still. i miss my friends, home and malaysian food. but what is there to complain when my parents will be here with me on the 1st raya? to abe n kak aini, jangan jeles!!! hahah! insyaAllah next year we will celebrate raya together as a family ok! I MISS YOU!!!!!! both of you!!! muah muah!!

p/s: selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin to everyone. may we get the opportunity to meet ramadhan again next year. be sure to drive or be driven carefully on the road. love all of u to pieces!!! last but not least, I MISS............... everything la!! heheh.. muahXXxx! *hugS*