Thursday, 31 December 2015



Oh well, just thought of joining in the crowd coz I was rather intrigued to see which pictures the app would choose. As expected, pictures from Mekah and Madinah would be in. :P

2015 has been a bit different from previous years. I don't think I have made that many new friends this year, but alhamdulillah, interesting happenings that are important enough for my years to come have taken place. Quite a lot i must say. :)

These 9 pictures only reflect a little part of my life in 2015. Not even one tenth of them. 2015 is a turning point for my future, my career and life as a whole. I am looking forward to 2016  with much hope and wishing that 2016 will be as great. If not, greater, insyaAllah

With that 2015, I bid you farewell. 


Tuesday, 29 December 2015

Sabar & Syukur

There is one thing i know for sure that i am not:
 A patient person. 

My parents always remind me to always be more patient in any situation. I get angry, agitated and sometimes hurt easily that i tend to raise my voice when such situation takes place. Though when i try to control my anger and my voice, it somehow becomes shaky and i start crying.

What i seriously want to be in years to come, is to be a more patient person. To be less temperamental and to be more sensible.

Anyway, i just wanna share something which i think is quite valuable. Each time i almost lose my patience, i will try to remember what a good-hearted friend of mine once told me:
"Sis, jika kita fikir sifat sabar itu adalah sifat terpuji yang pertama, kita silap kerana sifat syukur itu adalah pertama."

He said that when we have syukur in our heart, we can easily have sabar. Because when we are grateful for a certain situation, the feeling overwhelms the regretful feeling or anger that we have inside our heart.

For instance, if we can't go out of the house due to a flat tyre, we should be grateful that the tyre doesn't blow in the middle of nowhere when we are driving. Or if the food that we order tastes aweful, we shouldn't get angry instantly but instead, we should be grateful that we have money to spend outside compared to others who can't even afford a glass of plain water.

In any circumstances, always try to look for something good in everything. Being thankful is always better than complaining about something. 

Bersyukurlah sentiasa. Semoga dengan itu kesabaran akan turut hadir sentiasa. 


Tuesday, 22 December 2015

Fulfilling a childhood dream (in a way)

Oh my God. Please tell me what I am doing here....

As I walked out of the lift, I saw around 20 people were sitting patiently at the seats provided. There was a table for registration, and I made my way to write down my name and IC number.The person in charge passed me a sticker with number 29 written on it, and I stuck it on my shawl. There. As simple as that, I was registered for an audition.

Asking why I was trying out for this audition?
Here's why: I just wanted to do something a bit different and challenge myself for weird things that I have never imagined doing.

I actually have a private things-to-do list, that I would like to do before I actually.. hurm.. well.. die maybe? Trying out for an audition is one of those things. Of course I had once dreamt of becoming an actress or anything that relates to be on TV, but I think I have stopped dreaming because being a realist is so much easier. I figured that I have a job that I enjoy, I have my family around, and people who I love to keep me happy and that's enough.

So that's what I thought. However, after reading or listening to inspiring stories, I just can't help thinking that I should once in a while try to get out of my own comfort zone. 

I just finished rereading a book that I enjoyed so much. It's about a writer who had a writer's block and was encouraged by her editor to take a holiday to take her mind off everything and start afresh. Little did she know that she was bound to encounter countless happenings that lead her out of her own comfort zone.

I believe that life gets pretty flat and boring if we only do the same routine and we are afraid to get out of the circle. Doing something different as simple as trying out a new fashion or taking a new route to work can really make us feel more positive. Planning it ahead somehow makes us feel more excited and look forward for a brand new day.

Now that I have started working, I realise that there is not much impromptu things I have done compared to my student days. I used to just jump on random trains to go to places which I wasn't really sure of, bought bus or flight tickets on impulse to visit friends or family, or even walk aimlessly to unfamiliar areas just to take my mind off the stress.

Nowadays to destress, I prefer to go for body massage which of course, costs quite a lot. I can't simply take a trip to anywhere like those days as I have responsibility towards my job and I don't have that many days off anyway. Oh well,it is still not a good excuse for me not to do something crazy.

So, coming back to my audition story, I actually went through it. ALONE. Was planning to go with my colleagues but they had something else to do as it was planned at the very last minute. And yeah,I didn't do any homework, I just brought along my CV and some photocopied certificates which I already had in my room from my previous interview session.

At one point, I really wanted to make a u-turn and just leave without even going through it. But as I have waited for about 5 hours, I figured that it was only smart if I proceed with the crazy idea. I was just there to tick my list anyway, not to be called for real. :D

My partner was nice enough to give me a call to soothe my nerves a bit before my turn. At that time I just couldn't believe I was about to go for an audition. I didn't have any appetite, I felt like throwing up and my head was spinning. At least with him calling, I could put my mind off the audition. (Thanks for calling! :*)

Actually, I am glad I did it. It was one of my most refreshing acts for the past few years. I could say that it was such a nice experience to see how Sri Pentas actually looks from the inside. I could say that I have been to the cafetaria, washrooms, surau, and the primeworks studios. The people inside the audition room were surprisingly friendly and they instantly made me feel welcomed. They didn't know me yet they wished me luck. Some even gave some tips for the audition. Thanks so much!

 While waiting for my turn :D

The part which I enjoyed so much was of course, when I had to start talking while looking into the camera. Having the camera rolling with a boom mic hanging in the room, I felt like somehow my dream as a young girl has already accomplished.

I am an engineer by education, hence I didn't care what the turn out would be like. Of course as a now-realist, *ehem* I know people with mass comm background will have the advantage. Plus, I was there to fulfill my list. Having those things in my mind, I just performed like how I always am. Just being myself, and no expectations whatsoever. It's somehow a good platform to boost my confidence level.

So,yeah... such a good experience it was. If you are wondering what audition it was, it's an audition to be a host in a popular TV show in TV9. Have a guess? :P

Presenting, one of the contestants.. :D

Monday, 21 December 2015

Right on target

When i am keeping quiet on certain issues, it doesn't necessarily mean i agree with it. It might be because i just hate saying the wrong things. I know that giving my opinion can't simply change one's perception on something, so waiting for a certain eye-opening incident might be worth it.

Seriously i hate portraying myself as a demanding, self - centered, controlling person. Hence, when i am not in agreement, i just avoid talking about that particular topic to avoid any awkwardness. 

As a person with certain experience, i think i am capable of reading certain situations. Not that i usually make announcements of my own assessment, but when it is right on target, i just remind myself not to add salt to anyone's injury. 

To be on the safe side, always remember to try to be the better person. 

Just some random thoughts. Comments are not welcomed.

Sunday, 13 December 2015

Be in my shoes

When I kind of disagree with a person's action, it's quite easy for me to say to the person directly only if i am not that attached with the person. However, it gets especially hard when it involves someone who i am pretty close to.

Reason being, i am too scared to hurt the person's feeling. In the end, I become too careful in giving advice or voicing out my opinion. Somehow, the message that i try to convey, does not successfully get across. 

I try once in a while writing here in my blog to pass some message. However, i know for sure that not that many people read it. I used to write and share the link in my Facebook or Twitter or during student days, my YM status. As i am not really into Facebook anymore, i feel kind of embarrass to share some petty issues there. Knowing people nowadays only share more serious and global issues, i find exposing my blog to the world is kind of... lame..

What i do now is that i usually try to nonchalantly talk and give some examples to people. Probably they can see what i am doing, but i don't really bother. Afterall, i am dying to get my message across, only not in a direct manner.

I basically give examples to make them see a bigger picture. A picture of them inside it. Of them being in other people's shoes. If they have a feeling that it is NOT the way they want to be treated, then they should get the message that they SHOULD NOT be doing the same.

Some people do not realise that 2 can play that game. Or probably they can't see that what goes around comes around. For example, if some people dislike their parents for some reason and treat them badly, can't they see that their beloved children may one day do the same thing to them? 

There are a few other examples i wanna give but i guess people can think by themselves.. All that i really wanna say here is to always put ourselves in other people's situation before doing or saying something. 

Only then, we will know if it hurts others or not.

I miss taking shoe shots like this :)

Friday, 11 December 2015

Stop and Feel

Do you realise how busy we are with our daily lives that we tend to take everything for granted? We take the people we love for granted, we take the things that we enjoy so much for granted, and we take our precious time for granted. We have been living a very fast paced life with less appreciation of the things that we see everyday.

We say we love our friends and family so much, but yet, when we are with them, we spend more time with gadgets. When we have the time to talk to our loved ones, we prefer to complain on how lives have been so hard on us rather on saying how thankful we are to at least have people around who still appreciate our presence.

We say we love having free time so that we can enjoy every second by relaxing with the things and people we enjoy. But when we do have the time, we waste it with useless social media. We prefer interacting with the people in a different area rather than interacting with the people right across of us just in the same room.

We simply walk pass the things that we used to enjoy looking without even having a glance at it. We just listen to songs that we like so much without focusing on the melody or why we like them so much. We wash our hands using that favourite soap of ours without even smelling in the sweet smell which we used to enjoy sniffing in deeply when we were younger. We gobble our food without even taking time to enjoy every bite of it.

Why? Because everything we do in our daily life is just like  pressing a replay button. We are so used to everything. The people, the place, the taste, the smell, that we forget how to feel. We become less sensitive. We care even less.

Asking further, why? Because we have so much in our minds. Our work and the stressful life make us live this way. We somehow give in to such lifestyle. We make ourselves miserable for not even trying to make time for ourselves. For those who we love. For the things that we enjoy the most.

Consequently making other people around feel miserable too.


This is a reminder for me and for everyone, to take our time, to be happy, and to enjoy even the simplest things in life. Even if we have to, just stop and feel.. the presence of everything.

Saturday, 5 December 2015

Those were the days

Sometimes i just miss those days.

The days when i didn't have to think about things that deeply. Those carefree days when i couldn't even be bothered of what people think. The days when things were much simpler.

The days when i think i smiled so much more.

Thursday, 26 November 2015

Competitive much?

Sometimes i don't understand. I rarely want to compete with people. Though when i do, i am very competitive. Usually it involves competitions or exams when you obviously need to switch on your competitive mode.

However, in just everyday life, i see nothing that appeals to me to become a competitive person. I don't see the need to compete in getting people's love and attention, i don't see the need to compete in winning people's heart, i don't see the need to compete in showing how nice and likeable i am to people around me.

I am basically happy with myself, my circle of people, my beliefs and where i am. I don't need people's assurance of what i should and shouldn't do in becoming a model stereotype lady.

I sincerely can't see what is there in me that people need to be so jealous about to actually compete with whatever i do. I am just being myself. Loud, annoying, sometimes chatty (or overly chatty..depends on how people see it really :p), easily agitated, too frank, not ladylike enough and many other not-so-wife-to-be-material characteristics.

Despite being all that, i am veryyy grateful to have people liking me for who i am. I don't ask everyone around to like me. There is no such thing, is there? Hence, when i have a friend who is always acting sweet in front of others but finding fault in me each time and not exactly that sweet towards me, as if trying to show that she is better off than me, i kinda feel weird.

What are you trying to prove actually Missie? Why are you always not happy with what i do and forever trying to show that you are always better in every single thing you do or have? Yes i might be annoying, but i don't bother you, do i? Can't you just be happy for me once in a while?

Oh's my birthday today and somehow that person's real self has been reflected clearly today. Though my sister always says, that she has seen that side of this friend of mine since long time ago.

Anyway, happy birthday to me. I love everyone around me who takes me for who i am. Also, thanks for the lovely wishes people! I feel loved ♡ hehe..

P/s: i miss my partner so much :( i wonder how you are doing there...

Friday, 20 November 2015

Perfect day

The sky was clear as the clouds drifted away. Giving way to the bright yellow sun to perfectly distribute its warmth.

Came then the friendly wind. Blowing gently onto our faces. Slowly wiping away the sweat that was about to trickle.

The leaves on trees collided among themselves. Making soothing sound to our ears which probably we didn't often hear.

Even the birds were chirping a melodious happy melody. As though they were enjoying the moment, equally as the both of us were.

Together we lay down on the grass that felt like a carpet. Neither it was sharp, nor it was wet. It was simply green, soft and comfy.

We gazed into the sky, the beautiful clear blue sky. Appreciating every moment of tranquility while breathing in slowly the freshness of the air.

And we closed our eyes. It was a perfect day.


As we opened again our eyes, the sun was already setting, the clouds were already nearing. The wind started blowing a bit stronger, giving the both of us a bit of shiver.

The green grass turning dark, as the sky was slowly losing its light.

Although such moment was brief, it was not the end. We both know that another perfect day shall come again.

Wednesday, 11 November 2015

Reminiscing through old notes

I am right now waiting for Isya' prayer at the office. Have a lot of readings to do but I am giving myself a little break. Hence, I browsed my old notes at my Facebook account. I figured that I was quite active with my Facebook back then. And it seems like I was quite excited to write some real lengthy stuff about myself there. >.<

Phew.. Just take a look at what I wrote:


Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people (in the right hand corner of the app) then click publish.)

lots of people have tagged me. hurm, so here goes~

1 - i am a muslim, and proud of it.

2 - i love my family and i would give my life for them. ayah, mami, kak aini, abe!!!! i miss all of u!!! iqa nak balik!!! huhuhu

3 - i can talk very fast in one breath, without stopping! (somebody! plz stop me)

4 - i love cats!!! they dont have to be siamese cats or persian cats, just normal cats are cute enough... owww... i miss my cats!!!!!

5 - i like when people say my name when talking to me. i seriously do! :P

6 - friends come next after my family.

7 - and i learn to appreciate them as much as they appreciate me.

8 - i love travelling!! i really dont mind spending much money to see the world.

9 - i am a nature lover~! jangan tak caya!! im serious!

10 - i love the sea!! i can sit by the beach doing nothing just to relax and enjoy the beauty of life. oh, and i enjoy watching sunset!!!~ sangat cantik! ^_~

11- soothing and sentimental songs are nice! (dygta best!)

12- personally i feel old songs are much better. that's why im still stuck with the 80's and 90's songs.

13- i have moved to a lot of places since small. i have been to johor bharu, kelana jaya(yeke?), ttdi, malacca (oh, i miss skjpians so much >_

14- i am now studying in kobe university and i love it here! kobe is such a great place to be in. not too kampung yet not too crowded. just nice!

15- i am so glad to have such great company in kobe. fridays are the best!! ske main ping pong ngan korang~!! saturdays and sundays are great too, especially when we can get together. dear kobeians!! u guys are my family here!! thanks so much!

16- i love malaysian food!!! especially spicy food. podeh, sodap! nyum2! sambal belacan is my favourite. sambal belacan kedai sila rasa in UM sangat besh! ^_^

17- i love sports!! though im not that athletic. hehe... i contributed so little to perwira back in school years. but i really enjoy basketball! badminton!! ping pong!! and juge, futsal, kalau ade lagi... hehe

18- my mood depends on the weather. at times! heheh... i smile widely as i wake up early in the morning if the sun shines brightly. (utk kes tido balik pas subuh, ok!)

19- i can talk on the phone for hours. it's easier, and less confusing compared to sms.

20- i got stuck here, not knowing what else to write.

21- i kinda feel like a loser talking about myself. hahahah.... tapape....

22- i think i was so poyo, grayo, gile kuasa when i was in primary school. especially when i became a prefect.

23- i am postive that i am more mature now. heheh (does anyone want to second this?)

24- i was so selebet(selekeh) during my school days. somebody said so. hahaha... i admit it. but hey, i am still selebet now! not much difference though.

25- i try to live in the present, but of course, the past would not be forgotten. time flies, so i wil try to live life to the fullest. appreciate everything around while we still have the time to do so ^_~

yey! tamat! penat dah

(those who are tagged, feel free to do this tag. tapi, kalau malas takpe ;P)


I smiled the whole time I read through this note. It sure is funny how much I have changed since then.

Or, haven't I? :P

Monday, 9 November 2015

To be happy

To be happy is to be able to enjoy little things in life,
To be happy is to feel contented with whatever things we have.

To be happy is to be able to love and feel loved by people around,
To be happy is to always feel secure, and to be safe and sound.

To be happy is not always about the things we earn,
But to be happy is to be able to smile without any reason.

To be happy is not how our success is being shared,
But to be happy is to feel good without being compared.

Either to be happy or to be sad,
Is a choice that we have always had.

Be happy and be grateful,
It shall be a life that will always rule.

Monday, 26 October 2015

There is always hope

I guess when people already have some perception of you, even before you can answer their query, they have probably sketched a plot of how you might answer and how they are going to reply.

There is no use trying to give an impression when people have already put that judgement on you way before you are given any chance to win their heart.

This judgemental attitude is difficult for some people to get rid of. Maybe only someone superior can talk to them and let them open up their mind to have a change in perspective.

However, I do believe that somehow...

There is always hope for a person to change.

There is always space for acceptance.

There is always room for improvement.

And there is always time for a heart to heal.

Wednesday, 21 October 2015


It sure is funny when people keep on changing their minds. Especially when they keep on justifying their own words to make them look like they didn't mean it such way.

It's especiallly fun to see how people twist and turn their own words. When at the end, their words are used again by the other party to go against them.

To win the battle, they just have to be creative. And.. to have loaaads of practice.

Good luck people. Good luck in convincing others!

Sunday, 18 October 2015

Big Bang Theory

Have you ever experienced one of those days that nothing seems right?

Yesterday, on Saturday the 17th of October, I started my day with my usual basketball session with my brother. I lost the game, which wasn't really a big disappointment to me, but after coming home, I decided not to have my breakfast coz I had to rush for my nephew's aqiqah at Bangi. There I was feeling a bit hungry and not stable, I slammed the door at my back before leaving the house, realising my fourth finger got stuck at the door.

My sweet little finger, was screaming in pain. *or was i imagining things?*

Trying not to swear much, I rushed to my car and drove off to pick up my partner for the aqiqah. Right before reaching his place, I gave a call to reconfirm his location. After putting down the phone, I started to drive again and heard a LOUD screeching sound coming from the left side of my car. Yes, I had just scratched my precious precious car at the evil devider which I didn't see well enough. *cries*

Feeling hungry, angry, down and eveything you could think of, off we went to Bangi once my partner jumped into the car. Luckily he drove and I sat grumpily next to him, secretly feeling glad he brought along some energy bar for me. While munching away, we started to talk and talk. I was cool again and feeling glad to have someone who was cool enough to accept my unstable state at that moment.

Alhamdulillah the aqiqah went well. Met some family and good food was served, so I was okay again. We left my brother-in-law's house and went to the surau nearby for Zohor prayer. Oh so when I thought everything was going well, something just had to happen.

Guess what? After i changed my outfit to something more comfortable to be worn the whole day, I went to the mirror to adjust my scarf only realising some guys entered the toilet. I was thinking at that particular time: "err... why are they here? There must be some problem with their toilet that they have to come in here". Gosh, how wrong could I be? Just a few seconds later it struck me that it was ME who got the signs wrong!!

So apparently all these guys had been waiting for me the whole time when i was changing my outfit. Oh the humiliation!! Thank God I am the type who can keep a straight face, so there I was walking out slowly towards the right toilet..... ughhhh...

Anyway, after that eventful morning/afternoon, I tried to put everything behind and just enjoy the day. Despite me having a slight headache that we had to find some actifast, my partner and I had the best day ever pretending to be tourists. We took the bus, the train, walked at touristy areas, took videos and pictures, and ended our day at one of the most glamorous events of the year: Citrawarna2015.

I couldn't have asked for more. That was my first time spending more than 5 hours at Dataran Merdeka. The crowd was huge, the performance was stunning, and the experience was once in a life time. We got there as early as 5.30pm and we got the chance to eat at the food truck festival, sing with the performers at the chillax corner on the huge bean bags, watch Mud the Musical for free (although we had watched it previously at the Dewan Bandaraya), receive some goodie bags for free, and watch the awesome performances on the big stage introducing Malaysian culture.

Around 10.15pm I was getting a bit tired and we decided to leave the crowd. Right before calling the uber to get back to where we parked our car, we decided to take a look again at the food from the food trucks, only realising the fireworks were starting to shoot right on top of our heads! It was beautiful and I was stunt. I was mainly speechless because we were at the right spot at the right time with not many people around us. That was my first time being at the right spot for fireworks.

I remember when I was a student either at Japan or London, each time I had to go for Hanabi or Bonfire events, I had to struggle to find a good place in order to enjoy the beauty of the fireworks. But yesterday, we were simply lucky to be at that spot where the crowd was behind us and no cars were on that road since it was closed for the event, hence making me feel sooo comfortable and free to enjoy the beauty of the colourful fireworks without being blocked by anything or anyone. The fireworks were shooting right on top of our heads!!

Seriously, though my day started quite bad i must say, it turned out to be one of the most memorable days of my life. Well, no doubt having a good company is also important in creating such memory. :p

Thanks to you, my #1 listener, no matter how my day started, it somehow ended with a bang! A BIG, HUGE BANG! :*


Friday, 18 September 2015

True friends are hard to find

Sometimes I feel like hugging my best friends for being so supportive. Be it in voicing out their opinions or ideas on any possible issues I have ever raised, they always know the right things to say. However, since most of them are very far away from me, the least I can do is to give them a virtual hug or some smileys through our whatsapp conversations. :P

Many a time I feel like ranting about some weird things which to me, are merely petty issues. However, despite the pettiness of the issue, they never really ignore my problems but instead give me their never ending support.

A normal acquaintance might just give some general statement to the issues I raise due to the unattached feeling she or he has to me.

However, true friends will make sure I feel good, loved, not abandoned and confident in myself. True friends make time and shall never come up with excuses.

Thanks darlings. You all know who you are! :) *hugs*

Monday, 24 August 2015

Let it go for real

One of the posts that I have in my draft is entitled 'Strangers Again.' Somehow I couldn't bring myself to publish it, neither could I finish the entry, to be honest. It has been in my draft for a few months already.

I do understand that sometimes we are reminded of our past unconsciously. When we walk pass an area that we are quite used to visit, when we listen to songs that we once played over and over again, or due to any other occurrences that might transport ourselves to the past.

To be fair, I am reminded of my past quite frequently and that heart twinging feeling occurs quite often. However, I can't find a good reason for me to talk about it to other people, so I somehow just write somewhere that only I have access to it.

I feel that I rather not burden anybody else with any history that I have. Though I have no problem opening up if people ask me directly or sincerely want to know about it as I think it is better to know things like this directly from me rather than to get the source from a third party.

Somehow, isn't it weird if we keep mentioning of our past rather than living in the present?

Don't blame people if they think you are weird of not letting go of your past. Everybody has their own old stories. Whether the old stories are to be kept or to be shared is one's choice. I just feel that only when the time is right, the stories might be brought up.

And only, if it is to the interest or for the benefit of the listeners.

Gambar sekadar hiasan :p

Saturday, 15 August 2015


Some people when they are tired they are easily agitated. Even nothing can turn into something. Even when u are smiling they might see like u are scowling. Which ever way, let them eat first. Or else, u might be eaten instead.

Famous phrase: A hungry man is an angry man.


Sunday, 9 August 2015

Frankly Speaking

I used to be a very straightforward kind of person. Never did i have a problem telling people off when i was not in agreement with something. Sometimes i even had to remind myself that i need to be a bit softer or probably dilute my frankness to a certain degree just to make sure i didn't hurt the other party. Everytime i come clean on my real feeling, somehow i feel good. I feel relieved. Nothing to hide nothing to hold back.

However, now that i am a bit older i find that being straightforward is not really a good thing. I tend to curb my feelings and just go with the flow. And in the process, i die inside. Bit by bit.

For example, as i am the youngest in the family, i find it disrespectful to lash out any anger or disappointment to older people. However, as I myself still am struggling with my anger management, i just pray that i can be better with age. Specifically, for me to be more patient.

Sometimes i don't want to say the wrong things to people who are older than me, so i guess it is easier to just stay away and have less communication with them. People don't understand my struggle of not wanting to appear rude that i tend to be a bit subdued at times. I know my weakness i.e. saying the wrong things when i am angry. Hence, nowadays, if i am in a crowd and i am somehow not in agreement with something, i may not say i agree, but at the same time will also not say that i disagree. Which sadly, may still offend some people.

Another thing is being a person under someone. For example, an employee to his or her employer, i find that it is also not an option for us employees to go against the employer. Even if the employer does have a different idea which is not logical, employees can't say straightforwardly that the employer is stupid. Can we? Hence, playing around with words and saying yes at that moment is the only thing the employee can do.

The third case is when we have no idea who we are to a person. Sometimes we really have the urge to give an idea or show our care to another person, but we hold it back. Why? Because we might think that, "why should i say this to him/her? I am probably not even considered as a close friend. I am not family.  I am not his spouse. Why should i bother?" Although in our hearts, we feel like shouting that idea.

This non straightforward approach is somehow killing me. I would like to say what i think. I would like to have the freedom to say something.


At the end of the day, having a good relationship with people is what matters most. Oh well, it is still not the end of the world. Don't we all have The Almighty to listen to every problem we have? ;)

Bring me to the seaside. So i can put everything aside. :p

Friday, 31 July 2015

Me Time

I can't believe I'm saying this. But i think sometimes i do love to have a 'me time' more often. Nowadays i am easily hurt by people's heartless words.

As much as i dislike driving, i think i love the freedom i have when i am alone in the car. It's the only time when i can think deeply about something without any disruption. That's the only time i can sing at the top of my lungs. And that's probably one of the times i can cry my hearts out without feeling ashamed. Hoping that by the time i arrive at my destination, i shall feel alright again.

The more i meet people, the more ideas are exchanged. The more opportunities of listening to things which i might dislike. Sometimes it's also frustrating when we meet people at a wrong timing as they might not be in the best of mood or at the best state of mind.

Appearing hurt in front of a person is not something that i am fond of doing. Hence, i now prefer to refrain from being in such situations if i don't need to.

Hurm... i think i might drive by myself more often now.

Thursday, 16 July 2015

Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin :)

The only people who you can't choose but will stick with you through thick and thin are your family. I have been reminded so many times by my dad especially, that friends, are not everything.

Yes, I am very much aware of that. And I know for sure that my priority is my family. If my family is hurt in any way by somebody, I will probably hurt that person badly. That's just how my family is actually. We tell everything to each other. We share stories. We give ideas and we try to solve problems together. In simple words, we protect each other.

When I was once asked during a job interview of what I am passionate of, I didn't have to think twice. I knew instantly that I should write about my family. That's the only topic that I can discuss about through out the day without being bored.

However, I realise that I am the type who is easily attached with someone. Even if I know that I will always have my family to back me up in any situation, I still treasure my friends with my life. Yes, friends do come and go. But during the absence of a family, friends play a major role in your life.

If some friends are just destined to be gone from my life, I usually get upset for quite sometime. It takes time for me to get over it because to me, good friendship is hard to build. When a friendship ends, I am devastated and sometimes put the blame on myself.

Lately I figure that I have been losing quite a number of really really good friends due to unavoidable circumstances. It does hurt but I know that if something is not meant to be, it just isn't. Even how hard I try to make the relationship (read: friendship) work, it still won't if Allah has decided it to be that way.

Anyway, even if these people won't be in my circle anymore, insyaAllah I will still pray the best for them. For Allah to bless them with all the good things in life and for them to be in the best of health.

For this hari raya which is tomorrow, I would like to wish everyone who has ever crossed my path, family or friends, to forgive all the wrong things that I might have done or harsh words that I have ever uttered. I sincerely seek for forgiveness and may all of you have a very happy Aidilfitri.

Where am I celebrating raya this year? Of course, where my family is, is where I will be... InsyaAllah.. :)

Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin!

Sunday, 7 June 2015

Some things are better left unsaid

Lately quite a few people around me have been asking for my advice on their love problems. Not that I have much to share though, as I am no love expert myself. But what I can do is usually to give some general tips and explain things based on my own (limited) experience.

There was one time someone asked me on how he can woo this one particular girl. I told him some stuff, but the most important thing I said was just to be more sensitive. As I was talking on a girl's point of view, I realise all girls love attention and most importantly, being heard. It is hard to understand what really is at the back of a woman's mind as women tend to say something else when they actually mean something else. I, too, sometimes do that because I just don't want to stir things up and I guess it is easy to polite and more agreeable.

Being sensitive actually covers a lot of aspects. I simply explained that what he could do is to focus on what the girl is saying and show in subtle way that he actually remembers all those info. When a guy pays attention, it shows that he cares. It is as simple as that. 

Well, that is from one aspect. The other thing is to be more careful and to read the situation well. Being sensitive of a situation actually applies to everything. Not simply when one wants to win another person's heart, but it is also useful for our daily people's skill. There are times when we should and should not do something. There are times when we should or should not express/say something. 

For example, when someone is in distress because of something, say, a missing cat, that is the time to provide support and words of encouragement that the missing cat shall return. It is definitely NOT the time to say that the person could have been more careful to not let the cat out. Or even worse, to say that cats usually go missing when they are dying. (Like, seriously??)

A few days back I was rather down to find out my phone had some charging problem. So I told a few people of the situation. I am thankful that some people can be very sensitive to try to understand my problem and give some solutions. While there were some people making fun by giving remarks such as "Oh, don't worry Fiqah. Those days we didn't even have smartphones but we still managed to carry on with lives, right?" I don't know if that was supposed to be consoling or what, but I felt that it was poor taste. Unnecessary remarks should be avoided at alllll times. OK?

Another thing is that maybe we should be reminded once in a while that some things are better left unsaid. Not to the extend we hide things until it becomes suspicious, but it's just somehow I see people can be a bit insensitive at certain situation. Sometimes we might have the urge to tell some story which might be true, but if rationally it is unnecessary, do avoid saying it. For example, when we heard some stories about the person, especially if it might lower the person's spirit in any way, please refrain from telling him or her. Also, if we have some unnecessary past stories which might not make another person feel good or comfortable, just refrain from sharing it, shall we?

Being sensitive is not an easy thing to do. But slowly with experience, I think we can see clearer what is good and what is bad for us and others. InsyaAllah. :)


Friday, 5 June 2015

Show offs

I remember that I used to say that I won't take any offense on people unless they do something directly to me. I have a few friends who like to warn me of some other people who they think mean more harm than good to me. I usually just say thank you and take it with a pinch of salt as I have my own stance not to judge people unless any damage is done to me.

I think I am going to take my words back because I know now for sure that I am easily turned off by show offs. These show offs can be divided into two groups. One, those who are just interested in themselves and always think that they are better than the rest, and two, those who see themselves as the best among their circle and at the same time put the rest down, despite whatever they think are correct or not. 

In simple words, I am rather disgusted by this kind of people. 

Sometimes I just smile to one's brag on family, intelligence or beauty. They can talk like they have the most successful/well known family, siblings, cousins, uncles and the list goes on and on. Okay, so what you are saying might be true, but is it possible if you can put a little damper on it? Does it hurt if people do not know that much of your glittering success stories?    

And oh, some can do it rather subtly without sounding like they are actually bragging. Good job, you are one good actor/actress. I'm impressed. *clap clap* 

The thing is that, sometimes other people too might have things or stories which probably are even more bragging-worthy (I don't know if such things even exist), but people choose to keep quiet and let other people discover about them themselves. 

Hurm, to each his own. If you feel it is proper to brag, then, oh well... just carry on. But I think I might just start to stay away from these people before I become one myself. 

Personally, they do not harm me, but emotionally, they do.

Thursday, 30 April 2015


Different people have different ways of releasing stress. Some might smoke heavily, some might find their comfort food such as ice creams and some might shop for stuff which probably are not even needed. However, not all stress releasing activities are bad. Some even do activities which are good for their body and health such as going to gym. Not only it's good for their health, they can even meet people and make new friends.

In my case, I share my daily activities or happenings to my family and close friends. Though sometimes I do have to admit that I tend to tell people a bit too much about my life, that I have a tendency of not remembering the things that I have told. *my bad if I bore anyone to tears*

No matter what ever way one uses to release stress, the important thing is to remember not to hurt anyone during the stress releasing activity. Some people may irresponsibly let go of their anger to people who are not even involved in the situation. They tend to hurt others by using harsh words or worse, by using physical.

I totally understand that patience is something that is very difficult to achieve. I myself am very temperamental and sometimes can't really manage my anger. That is why the kind of people we are mingling with is very important to us. They are the ones that might shape how and what we become. During my training last 2 weeks, i was even given a free advice on selecting a partner in life as the trainer somehow roughly knows my characteristic. *blegh*

Ok people, may u all find the best technique to destress!

Currently, quite obsessed with travelling. Looking at the world definitely brings a lot of happiness to me. ;)

Saturday, 4 April 2015

Transition in life

Transition in life happens every now and then. However, the effect is somehow different to different people. Some may adapt to the transition easily, while other may find it a bit more difficult.

An easy example that has been bothering me lately is of course, the implementation of GST in Malaysia. I shall not discuss whether or not GST is a good thing as it would just stir people's emotion. The implementation of GST has directly affected all Malaysians. Obviously it is a new way of life that we have to abide, whether we like it or not. And from my observation, it is not something that people can adapt to easily. One complaint after another, and I am seeing pictures of receipts everywhere over the net for the 4th day already now. *yawn*

Okay, so transition doesn't just have to be the change of an era. It might even be the change in our daily routine. When one person has graduated from university, the transition might then be from a student life to a working life. That kind of transition usually takes time for a person to adapt to the lifestyle. Getting used to hanging out with friends to hanging out with colleagues obviously needs some time and as the social lifestyle also changes, it might even affect the emotion. 

In such transition, we might feel like we are losing something along the process. The attention we usually get from the people who we are used to be with, or the familiar feeling might no longer be there, hence affecting our emotions. The emptiness does hurt, but just for a while. As time passes by, we will start to move on or we might even enjoy the new surrounding that we are involved in.  

To me, any transition needs time. Time heals any negativity. Just give more time for something that we are not really used to. Try finding the positivity in something that we can't change. If we are entering a new phase of life, try to look for the good side of the new phase and make full use of it. If we are meant not to be in touch with some people anymore, try to find the good side of the people we are meant to stay in touch with. It applies to any situation. 

Because not all transitions are bad. It's how we ourselves deal with the situation.

Friday, 13 March 2015

Tribute to strong mothers

Alhamdulillah, just 3 days ago my sister gave birth to another baby boy who is soo lovely. Call me an obsessed auntie or whatever, I just love kissing his soft cheeks and carrying him here and there. I guess I am a bit more excited this time because I never had the opportunity to be around when my sister or sister in-law were carrying Armaan or Arisya or even during Armaan’s or Arisya’s first few days.

I am just glad I could be in the hospital with my other family members when my sister gave birth to Baby A last Tuesday. Listening to my sister’s labour story and seeing myself how she is somehow still in pain, I am very much amazed how women can be so strong and go through all the difficulties just to make sure their babies are safely born.

presenting my new nephew: Baby A :)

Of course, as I have expected, in the hospital, my dad told us again the story of how me and my other siblings were born in our own unusual ways. Yes, I have heard the story no less than 50 times but I still cringe each time I listen to the story. My mummy is a person with a very low pain threshold, yet she almost sacrificed her life to make sure I was safely delivered. I can’t describe how I am still quite surprised that despite having one leg popped out first instead of my head, I still managed to see the world. Alhamdulillah. :')

I am sure all mothers have their own different stories to tell their children, but one thing that mothers have in common is that they will give anything to have their babies safely delivered even if it means their lives are at stake. Carrying the baby around with backache, pretty bad morning sickness and worst of all, mood swings, I really adore the patience a mother has to go through for almost 10 months plus months and months of adapting to parenthood.

I have seen so many mothers with small child/children talk fondly of their children and of how much they love them to the moon and back. How they get pretty angry if some people mistreat their children. The love a mother has for her children is unconditional. It is magical. That is why people usually say mothers know best. :)

With all the sacrifices a mother has given, I find it very strange if a child takes a mother for granted. Mothers should always be in our top priority no matter what, moral wise or even religion wise. Even IF one day they do something that is not according to our liking, always remember that without their love and care, without them raising us, without them at the first place, there would never be us. 

If we want our children to respect us when we are old and grey, then better be sure that we ourselves respect our mothers. I always believe that one of the keys to a happy and blessed life is to always love and respect our parents. InsyaAllah, Allah will ease every single thing that we do. 

To all strong mothers out there, you all are the BEST! 

p/s: Please pray that I can be one too one day! ;P

Thanks mummy for always being a lovely mummy to your daughter. I love you to the moon and back! ♡

Saturday, 28 February 2015

Life-changing decisions

We are bound to make decisions every single day.

Questions we ask ourselves everyday may include, "which route shall I take to avoid the heavy traffic?" or even as simple as, "what shall I eat today?" No matter how big or small an issue is, we still have to make the decision so that our life moves smoothly.

Some things can easily be decided on our own without any help from people around. 

However, there are also things which require more time before a particular decision is made. Usually those are the life-changing decisions which need more attention and discussions with other people to make us feel confident enough with the option we might take.

These life-changing decisions are usually related to job offers and marriage proposals (mainly for ladies). Things get even harder when geographical changes are involved. If a person gets a particular job offer that the person has been working very hard for, plus the pay is very high, the only thing that might stop him/her from taking the offer, is usually the geographical factor. The one thing that might be at the back of one's mind is usually about the people he/she is leaving behind.

If the office of the new job is just a few blocks away, then it is not such a big problem. It becomes a problem when the new job offered is in a different state, or much worse, in a different country which has a totally different culture.

Similarly, this also applies to choosing a life partner. Geographical factor seems to be a very big issue to some. I have seen some very controlling  parents who do not allow their children to get married to people from some states. As I have mentioned above, this is more of a problem for ladies as ladies are expected to follow the future husbands wherever they might be. It will be easier though if the guy does not mind to settle down at where the girl comes from.

But to me, 2 people from different states getting married is never an issue. A girl usually starts to get confused when she gets a marriage proposal from a guy from a different country. Now that's something to ponder upon. To the girl, not only the people that she might leave behind is bothering her mind, but does the sacrifice she's taking is worth it? Will there be any regret, or indeed by saying 'yes' is the path to her happiness?

There is only one conclusion I can think of. It is our LOVE towards the matter is the one that counts.

If the person being offered the new job (in another or even the same country) is sure enough that the particular job is what he/she loves to do, no matter how different the culture of the people around, he/she will still be happy with the decision made and the difficulties are only seen as challenges in life. 

Similarly, if the person being proposed to is sure enough that the person who proposed her is definitely THE one for her, she should be ever ready and willing to move to another place and lead a new life. Things might be a bit different at the beginning but with some effort, things shall be easier in the long run. InsyaAllah...

But of course, before making any decision, never forget HIM in our calculation. Pray to Allah as Allah is the all knowing... InsyaAllah what ever decision we make, it will be made easier for us.

Masjid Nabawi, Madinah 

Wednesday, 4 February 2015

No one else

No matter how much you trust someone or how much you think someone really cares about you, you can never put 100% responsibility on that person. One can only give suggestions and pray that you do the right thing. But asking a person what the right thing to do is like asking that person to take over your life, when he or she has a life of his or her own.

We can always think that our life is that important and if we have a problem, our trusted people should drop other things and lend their ears to our stories. However, we shouldn't forget how others have their lives to run too. They too have problems that they themselves can't solve easily.

Always be prepared to realise that somehow we live as one person. One person that leads a life. A life that is important to only ourselves. Putting high hopes on others to solve anything we have is not a good move.

Yes, we can share our problems to others. Yes, we can pour our feelings to people. But never, expect much in return. After all, it's us who make the decision. It's us who run that particular life. Not anyone else.

Wednesday, 28 January 2015

Reality Check

The effect that one has on another person is truly amazing. From happiness to hope to disappointment, a person can totally play a big role on another person's emotion. However, not everyone realises how they might  affect other people's feelings or state of mind. It requires more than just common sense on how one should act or how words should be properly chosen.
Although we too are capable of controlling  our own emotions, sometimes we tend to get carried away and simply let scars enter the heart.  
Probably it's because we have high hopes on others. Probably we are always optimistic and never really think others have such low common sense. Probably we are just too dense. 

Probably what we really need, is a reality check.